Lara Croft: Tomb Raider (2001)
Born into wealth. Groomed by the elite. Trained for combat.
Starring: Angelina Jolie, Jon Voight, Iain Glen, Noah Taylor, Daniel Craig, Richard Johnson, Chris Barrie, Julian Rhind-Tutt, Leslie Phillips, Robert Phillips, Rachel Appleton, Olegar Fedoro, Henry Wyndham, David Cheung, David K.S. Tse
Director: Simon West
Running Time: 100 minutes
US MPAA rating: N/AUK BBFC rating: PG
Action, Adventure, Fantasy
On DVD Iain Glen, in his role here as half-hearted and wholly unconvincing ne'er-do-well Manfred Powell, looks a bit like Leslie Grantham. That just happens to be entirely fitting, given that 'Lara Croft: Tomb Raider' is basically just an extremely high budget episode of 'Fort Boyard'.
Angelina Jolie takes the title role, which means she gets to play a video game heroine with a ridiculously over-sized chest. Already, that's two (or should that be three?) reasons why this project was always going to make its money back at the box office. Let's face it, the world's never going to suffer from a shortage of teenage boys. But does that make it a good film? Perhaps, but only if there have been a few overnight alterations made to the Oxford English dictionary and 'good' suddenly means 'complete and utter rubbish'.
So what happens? Not Hellish much. Some ancient relic or other gets nicked, Lara tries to nick it back, Leslie Phillips gets a couple of lines (not, disappointingly, 'oh' and 'behave'), Jon Voight (Jolie's real-life pop) gets a couple more, and everyone kicks each other in the face a few times. Thankfully this only goes on for about 100 minutes - then we can all go out and do something much more worthwhile. Like head-butting a fence with a nail sticking out of it, for example.
The best thing about this pile of pap is that most of it takes place almost completely in the dark. Thank director Simon West, who clearly had enough good sense to give this one the 'make sure the audience can't see a bloody thing' treatment. Cheers for that Simon. At least there's one person involved who's got his head screwed on properly.
DVD Extras: 'Digging into Tomb Raider' cast and crew interviews, 'Crafting Lara Croft' physical training sequence, stunts and visual effects featurettes, 'Are You Game' look at the 'Tomb Raider' game, audio commentary from Simon West, deleted scenes, an extremely drawn-out alternate main title sequence, U2 'Elevation' video, and a whole bunch of DVD-Rom extras for fancy-dans with computers. Oooh, just look at yourselves.
It's Got: Chris Barrie - soon to appear in 'Red Dwarf: The Movie'. Yessss!!!
It Needs: A lead character who can accompany the good looks with some sort of wit and charm. A half-decent plot wouldn't go a-miss either.
Alternatives: Lara Croft: Tomb Raider: The Cradle of Life, Raiders of the Lost Ark, The Mummy, The Mummy Returns
Summary: Potty-level action flick. Call me old fashioned, but I'm sticking to Indiana Jones.
Review by Gary Panton
Review Date: 21th July 2003
External Links
Lara Croft: Tomb Raider at the IMDB
Comments1 Comment |
| i think this movie was a welcome change from the norm. This movie is about a female hero which in todays society you dont see that often. Being a female i would rather see a powerful woman fighting for what she believes in with a little sex appeal than a woman who sleeps with every one she meets and has no respect for herself. So please dont call me old fashioned because i think it is that kind of thinking that made women poperty and not people too. Because of her role in that film i think a lot of women could see themselves as strong without a male... unless Mr.Panton does not approve of powerful women! |
| Comment by:- Anonymous | | 18 August 2004 | ip: logged |
